This year for me is all about balance. Balance is very hard for me. Being a wife and mom, business owner and main photographer, and a person trying to maintain my passion for art and also my own health. I know there are a ton more things I need to cram in but I decided at the beginning of the year that I wasn't going to make any more excuses for getting healthy emotionally and physically. If you've known me for a long time you 'll probably know my weight has always been a struggle for me. My pregnancy tipped the scale for me and I've never recovered. It's been very draining carrying around the emotional and physical baggage that comes to being bigger. It was really hard for me last year to take the time for myself to get healthy. Work and being a new mom and then part laziness when I actually had a free moment that I could have worked out. Last year I tried every diet and worked out here and there but never consistently. I know for me it was more of a mental barrier. When I'd get to a certain point I'd feel like even though I'd lost some, in my mind the rest felt like it would never come off and I'd give up before I'd barely begun. Ive lost and gained the same 20 lbs 3 times. So ridiculous. I really want to have another baby but I know I cannot emotionally handle it until I feel healthier. I want to be strong and fit and a healthy example for my kids. So this year, as selfish as it sounds, is about me. Not just about what I want to get, but what I want to give to my family. I signed up for my very first race. I'm going big. Half Marathon in Disneyland in September. I needed a goal that I could envision every time I go workout. That seems to be all I think of when I'm working out. Mostly my mind freaking out about "will I be able to do this????" but I keep going and I feel my body getting stronger. My body has not been doing well getting used to running again. I've had horrible shin splints and foot pain but I'm seeing a sports medicine chiropractor and he is finding some ways to help me. Basically I have the most messed up feet ever but I'm not gonna let it stop me. As Lisa told me weeks ago and I remember it every time I'm hurting "Pain is just weakness leaving the body." So true! I'm definitely getting stronger. No matter what I have to do. I can't wait to see the results of my hard work. I know it will not be on my own. God has seriously blessed me with a great group of workout accountability buddies. I know I wouldn't be as strong on my own without the mutual support we all share, as well as God giving me the strength to dig deep out of my emotional blocks. I will post my progress on here leading up to the race. Any prayers would be greatly appreciated. 13.1 mile race seems so far away from the 2-3 miles I'm up to know. I will do it though.
After I got home from the gym I came home to my two favorite guys. Thankfully Todd was feeling better so I got to shower in peace while he watched Jax. A shower in peace is rare with a toddler! After my shower I felt like looking somewhat attractive so I put on a little makeup with some help from my little helper. He likes to stack it all for me. :)


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